The Long Road to Recovery
In my quest to run the 50 miler and hold the first ever New York City Ultramarathon, I injured my meniscus and had to stop training. The first few weeks were demoralizing. All I could think about was running. I even tried to a few times and it only led to pain and the risk of long term damage. Every time it was a perfect day and I saw someone running past me I couldn’t help but think about how lucky that person was. In short, I felt bad for myself. I was self-pitying and it was all I could think or talk about.
Then I decided to start the long road to recovery. I started slow with some stretching and resistance exercises at the local park. Nothing too intense, I didn’t want to re-injure myself. Then one day I decided to go for a bike ride. So I rode and rode until I reached the airport. And then I stopped. It was close to sunset and I just sat there by the water, all alone, watching the planes take off one by one and sail into the sunset. All I could think about was the long journey those people were about to embark upon. What adventures they might have, what tales they might create, what people they might meet and what fate would befall them.
Then I stopped myself in mid-thought. I realized something. Those people taking that journey weren’t doing anything different than I was. In fact the journey I was on may have been more exiting than theirs. Perhaps this entire time that I’d been injured and feeling bad for myself. Perhaps that entire time was just a test. A test to see just how badly I want it. A test of courage, foritutde, perseverance, and in the face of imminent failure, the will to go on and succeed. To win the day and say to myself “Wow…that was incredible…THIS is incredible.” This is what it means to live. To choose to live. To choose to react to our circumstances in the way we see fit, not in the way that others tell us to or the way our brain reacts naturally. But to consciously think. To dig down deep inside and find the will to go on. After all, isn’t that what the ultramarathon is all about?
So I’m at the start. I’m at the beginning again. I’ve chosen the long road to recovery. At the end of that road is the 50 miler. So what if the journey takes longer? That means there’s more of it to enjoy!
